I don’t think there’s anything a person that’s poor and angry loves more than ramen noodles. They’re cheap as hell, and they keep forever! Not only that, but you can whip them up in about 5 minutes, so you can continue playing video games and smoking weed.

Some corporate genius must have noticed that the ramen consumption is going up nationally, because out of nowhere, the price doubled. I really don’t see how this is justified – a 100 percent price raise? Well, even at that cost, I suppose it’s still easy to live for a week for a couple of bucks.

But even that has its own price. Have you ever tried to eat nothing but ramen noodles (and 40′s of Olde English malt liquor) for a week straight? I had that unfortunate experience – it was not a pretty sight. Good thing the sink was close enough to the toilet so that I could release sodium water from both orifices simultaneously.

It’s a good thing that ramen is still cheap and affordable. How else would we get our daily requirement of thousands of milligrams of sodium? I mean, you’re not going to get that from a salad – unless you smother it in ranch or italian dressing by WishBone. But have you seen how much THAT stuff costs? You’d be a fool not to save your dough and get some dehydrated enriched wheat product…. a value that LASTS!